Thursday, January 18, 2007


*In the calmest, of calm tones, I am hoping that people would be able to read between the lines*
Almost everyone raves of the 6 year old who can paint pictures beyond his years, or the 15 year old who graduated with a double degree from some fancy schmancy university. We seem to be in awe of those who manage to do what none of us could even dream of at that age, let alone carry out when we are much older. We can all agree that the human brain would have to be mature in order to digest and achieve such feats. Somehow though, all the achievements above seem more and more trivial as we get along in life.
I am not trying to play those achievements down, as individually, each achievement on its own is absolutely wonderful and special. However, I seriously couldn't care less about those achievements. I am however, more interested in another kind of maturity. The emotional kind. I know so many people who may think like an adult, certainly look like adults, but have the emotional maturity of a baby elephant (non-existant, for those of you trying to figure out the analogy). It doesn't bloody matter if you can get into an intellectual conversation about politics in the Balkans, if you can't even hold your own when life gets a little difficult on you.
I think this is the reason why they prefer to promote married people. Married persons are often deemed more stable. More secure. More.. you guessed it, emotionally mature. You may have an IQ of 1000, but if you don't have any EQ, you're about as useful to anyone, not just a company, as dust on the carpet you walk on. Emotional maturity, to me, enables a person to better use his intelligence, to be able to go through the day without feeling like it's the end of the world, to for once, think that the world doesn't bloody revolve around him/her alone. As you might have guessed, the key, I feel, is to not allow your emotions to swing like a wild pendulum, trying to knock over everyone around you.
Yes, everyone is entitled to their breakdowns, but to wallow in self pity, to purposely sabotage themselves, to even prefer to be edgy, is just being too much. At the end of the day, all that you are doing, is becoming an absolute liability to those around you, be it your family, friends, colleagues, bosses etc. Before long, no one would want to be associated with you, simply because no one can tolerate you (because you're a pain in the ass). Think what you may, do as you want, but other people can only tolerate so much of your moodswings.
Fuck off and die if you feel like it, instead of just threatening suicide. Otherwise, put on a fucking smile and be happy that your mother hasn't died of AIDS and that you're not dying of malnutrition and hunger.
"Nak Hidup, Segan, Nak Mati, Tak Mau". PIIIIIII LAHHH.
(Translated Loosely: Shy to live but don't want to die)
If you think the above is about you, well, stop being so self-centered. I'm just making a general observation on life. I too, am working on my EQ afterall.

Monday, January 15, 2007

Want that?

How come, in the certainty of our lives, can no one tell me what they'd want in the future? It seems that for all the wants of the present, which people do not have any qualms about airing, that there isn't an equal want for any time in the future? Have we come to an extent where we are so preoccupied with the present and the past, that we cannot spare a second to think of the future?

Case in question. I work for a shipyard. Every year, the shipyard procures mesmerizing amounts of steel, pipes and other equipment. Yet, for the love of god, not a single person can tell me what they'd wanna buy beyond a week from now. Everybody sure as hell knows what they wanted yesterday, last week, or even last month, but no one can tell me what they'd want tomorrow for instance, or two weeks from now, let alone a quarter or a year from now. Why is that? Why is so much energy being put into what we need at the current moment, so much so that there's little, if any energy being put into what we MIGHT need in the future?

Everyday, we fight a battle to get through the day. Everyday, all we seem to be able to do, is ensure that we live to reach our beds at night, only to wake up loathing war the next day. Very few of us actually seem to make it a point to ponder, before bed for instance, what we can do to win the subsequent battles, what we can do now, that would pay dividends later.

My ex girlfriend once told me that if we did not live the present, that there would be no future. I of course, had no reply for her, because she is that kind of person. She lives for the present. She knows what she wants, but only what she wants today, and what she wanted yesterday. We were essentially two very different human beings, one concentrating on the present, and the other, on the future. Neither of us saw eye to eye on most matters. Neither of us have ended up wrong. I think.

Now that the future has come, how prepared will any of us be for it? Have we even done enough in the morning, to ensure an easier evening? Or were we too occupied resolving yesterday's issues? Today will become yesterday, tomorrow. We can either live today like it is tomorrow, or live today like it will be yesterday.