Sunday, July 31, 2005

Of Bastards and Dogs

I live in old-suburbia PJ, where streets are lined with decrepit bungalows, built in an age where very much every other part of PJ was nothing more than acres of rubber estates. In this part of town, all you get are ancient Tan Sri's, Datuks, YB's and generally old people, living out their years in what they deem as idillic. To me, you just end up feeling older in the company of old people. Doesn't help that chicks are rare and far between (by this I mean the daughters/grandaughters available). When you do find them, they're just about old enough for you to call "kakak/aunty". Far cry from Sri Hartamas (where I used to live, back when it wasn't as famous).

What we DO have though, are lots of dogs. On the street I live in, 11 of the 17 houses lining it have at least 1 dog. On average, there are about 1.5 dogs per house I reckon. A real animal's heaven this. Now, I've got nothing against dogs, and I must admit that most of them are pretty friendly to the frequent walker like me. What I am against, is the releasing of dogs in the evenings and nights, so that they can do their thing (poo digested Pedigree Chow Chow) all over the street. Its disgraceful really, how old and well off people cannot and will not be a little more civic conscious.

Most people don't give a dogs ass, because they don't have to walk along the street. It becomes a minefield in the mornings, having to avoid, sidestep and jostle my way around piles of dogdung. This, while chewing on breakfast, and planning my working day. As if that isn't enough to contend with, everytime a car goes over a pile of shit, it multiplies the patches. Spreading the joy all over. What was essentially one pile turns out to be 5 patches after a car goes over it. Have another car go over the patch, and it's multiplied again. Reminds me of my art project in kindergarten.

What should have been done is an amendment to the municipal laws (along with its due enforcement of course). If owners can't be bothered about picking up after their dogs, pound every single unattended animal outside the owner's compound. Animal needs exercise? Tough luck, you'd have to bring them for a walk yourself. Not let them run free dumbass. Else you'd prefer me picking up after your dog, after which I will throw your dog poo on your spanking new Mercedes. Owning pets brings about responsibility, just in case you don't know.


I was on my way to breakfast this morning when I passed by a newspaper vendor. There, one particular headline caught my eye. It said, "Anak Halal Jadi Haram" (From legitimate child to bastard). With just about every other newspaper talking about the fuel price hike, this was the exception. Not wanting to spend RM 1 on what is essentially tabloid material, I took a brief glance at what the article had to say.

Apparently, it said that a father was grief stricken when he found out he couldn't put his name on the birth certificate of his child because his marriage certificate was fake. Question. Who the fuck comes up with fake marriage certs, and for what purpose? Where the hell did he obtain a fake cert, and lastly but most importantly, isn't it stupid that a father not be given his right to put his name as the child's father in the birth cert?

These cases brings back the whole ideal of marriages in our often religious and cultural eyes. I'm guessing that the guy probably got married somewhere along the Thai border to avoid detection by his first wife, either that or he just bought a certificate so as not to get caught with his pants down in a dingy motel when religious officers come knocking. Else, I can't forsee any other reason as to why the state religious department itself would issue fake marriage certs.

Of greater importance is the fact that they will rather let the child be a bastard child, without a father to "call his own", rather than having a man, who professes to being the father of the child, being allowed to claim so legitimately. I really do hope it has nothing to do with being legitimately/religiously married. Is this, or is this not a flaw in our system? What is the rationale of having marriage be prerequisite for being a father? What the fuck is happening?

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